The Final Month!





I just caught myself smiling:  the 12, 9, and 6 year-olds are working diligently on separate school-related tasks.  It is a lovely solitude to hear the scratch of pencils on paper, the muttering of math problems being worked aloud before showing the work on paper, the shoving of shapes into their puzzle places, and the occasional "correct answer sonance" from the educational website.

But this is my last month of having three grammar students!

My oldest, who has been a  memorization wizard the past 12 years is now rolling his eyes when asked to recite (though he is still a memorization wizard....).  He is questioning my instructions, or resisting my help....he's got this.  He is also graduating to his own room this summer, complete with a desk and bookshelf of his own.  He's organically ready to launch into a new developmental stage and a new way of learning and working out his faith.

Like a mother duckling, I have led them down spiritual, academic and aesthetic paths during circle time, individual learning time, and the practice of reading, writing, and arithmetic. Now I have one commencing into Socratic circles, researching his topics for writing and persuasion and making his own checklists.  It's rather liberating becoming the manager and watching him become the owner of his time and talents.

I will not lie:  homeschooling is THE HARDEST path I've ever taken. 


It's hard because every turn in the labyrinth has a mirror hanging on the wall to show me another angle of myself, and the ugly truth I see reflecting back to me has done more surgery on my soul than any doctor would think is safe or healthy.  You guys.  It took me 10 years of motherhood and all this mess of home birth and home school and home making to finally settle into my skin.  I was like a dog trying to find a comfy spot to stop and rest, who keeps turning round and round and trying out new positions.  That was me.  For at least a decade of motherhood.  Though there are rough patches, at least I'm finally content.

In fact, I'm EXCITED to witness growth in myself and my kidlets and to feel the great JOY that has emerged in this journey.  It's work like a farmer who is up to his thighs in dirt and mud, hands gritty and rough with filth under his fingernails and scarred skin from all the poking and prodding and pruning and scuffed brows where his earth-laden hands have wiped the dripping sweat.  It's a muddy mess in these trenches.  That is because home education is done in the trenches of real life, with rooms laden with idols and decorated with distractions.  It's done in the filth of our hearts where there is constant warfare and self-indulgence.  But the result of that planting and pruning and tilling in all kinds of weather is stronger muscles, thicker skin, repentance, compassion and gratitude that the Lord has worked in spite of us!  Not to mention the working out of our salvation and faith by plummeting the depths of our hearts and desires.



The greatest comfort and most fervent prayer of my heart 
this past year has been 
"The Lord's Prayer."


Our Father 
(My abba, my daddy, whose room I can burst into with joy or in fear without knocking,)

Who art in heaven
(You are are the creator God. You are seated on your throne with the earth as your footstool.  This is where my daddy lives and I place my mind where you are, 
for my life is hidden with Christ, in God.)

Hallowed be THY name 
(Show up in all I say and do - be glorified even when my heart isn't right.)

THY kingdom come 
(So, these aspirations, desires, needs, all the things I have prioritized today to go the way I think they should go: my to-do list - all sandcastles built with my hands, unless they are YOUR work, may the waters of mercy wash away my kingdoms of sand - the pressures I put on myself or my kids to be whom I think we should be in order to feel good about my place on this earth.)

THY will be done on earth as it is in heaven 
(After washing these kingdoms of sand away, 
turn my heart toward your word, your work, your will.)


Give us this day our daily bread 
 (In you are all the riches in heaven and earth - you can provide all that I need for today, tomorrow is not to be added to today's worries.)

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us 
 (Most merciful God, I have not loved you with all my heart, mind, and strength and I have sinned against those around me in thought, word and deed; please help me to forgive others as you have forgiven me, because everyone else is in the same boat, and I feel hurt when my kids or husband or parents or friends aren't mindful of their actions towards me.
The dude on the road and the lady in the grocery too.)

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil  
(Lord, my adversary, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion seeking to devour me today!  Please, help me to RUN from temptations that I so easily succumb to, protect me from the evil one, from the evil in my own heart and in those around me.  Help me to resist it!)

For THINE is the kingdom  
(The devil will NOT get the final victory - greater is he who is in me than he who is in the world, and though I fight battles each and everyday, Christ is the Victor - we know how Revelation ends.  The garden was your kingdom on earth and you have been redeeming it ever since.  And when we come into your heavenly kingdom to rule and reign with you, 
the picture of your purposes will be complete.)

And the power 
(All power is yours in heaven and on earth - you spoke and the earth was made, 
while we were dead in our trespasses
and sin you made us alive - 
you resurrected CHRIST!
That is how powerful you are.)

And the Glory 
(The weight of all that matters rests on you and 
you shine out in all creation, including humankind, your image-bearers.)

Forever and ever. Amen! 
(There is no end to your kingdom and your glory.
 We rejoice in our place being secure.  We belong for all eternity.  
You reign for all eternity. This is the truth!)

Peace of Christ to you!


To the left are several books that have helped me on my journey with Christ and into motherhood and home education.  I have also listed curriculum I use.  I hope you one or more of these to be comforting and helpful to you too.

If you're thinking about home-educating I really recommend RC Sproul, Jr.'s book "When You Rise Up," https://amzn.to/2LcSwqo, which lays the ground work for why you might choose this path. 

Ruth Beechick's book "The Three R's" https://amzn.to/2Iz8Nnu is a short easy read for the simplicity of learning at the primary level.

SDG







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