Promises




Before kids I had all the answers.  You see the kid in the store throwing the tantrum and think, "That parent has done a terrible job training her child. I would never let my child get away with that behavior."  Then you birth the child and realize how little control you actually have.  They have their own personality, their own gifts, their own preferences, their own idols.  The good, the precious, and the downright ugly. 




You reflect on all the ideals you had before you had kids.  All the ways in which you would train them - all the scripture they would memorize, all the healthy foods they would eat, all the methods of discipline that would train them to be good citizens and make them polite to other humans.  Then you begin trying these methods out.  The battle begins.  The spiritual warfare wages heavily in your heart and in your home.  And you think, "nothing I do seems to work; where are the results that I was promised in all the books?"



Nothing has challenged my faith more than having three thriving boys who push the boundaries of everything from grace to gravity.  Nothing.  Ask me 10 years ago if I believe the promises in the Bible, I would have responded, "Absolutely!"  Ask me now whether or not I believe the promises in the Bible, I will tell you, "I hope they're true...they're all I've got!"  

Nothing brings me to my knees like walking by faith.  And when I say "walking by faith" I do not mean to sound cliche like good Christianese....I mean walking completely in the dark, hands groping for anything tangible, except for light of the scripture before me, believing when it says, "if you strike him with a rod you save his soul from hell"  or "train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it."  The results don't always show up right away.  In fact, some results never show up until they are old.

I spent these past several days this week putting out "fires," resetting directions, disciplining, training, bandaging wounds, repeating my words ad nauseum...only to plop us all down in chairs for the "final countdown" - Mommy finally proverbially throwing her hands up and saying, "I've talked to you, disciplined you, done all I can to help you....what must I do to make you obey?"  My eldest leaves the room and comes back with my Bible in hand and puts it on the table.  He says, "This is all you need, Mom."  He opens the Book and finds what he is looking for then reads, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Ephesians 6:1.  That's all you need to tell us, Mom." 


After I receive tender hugs and kisses and promises to obey, we high five and I thank him for reminding me...reminding my feeble memory of the fact that GOD is at work; that GOD is taking my limping efforts and my mere obedience and turning them into gold and silver in the hearts of my children.  My job is simply to show up, be faithful to do the work He has prepared for me before the foundation of the earth, and trust HIM to work the results HE has ordained.  I am His partner.  Do I believe God is faithful to accomplish His work in me and my children?  Do I believe the promises in His word?  I believe.  Now Father, help my unbelief.  sdg




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Salvation

Image
I finally got a full night's sleep!  The baby didn't wake, nobody needed nightmare comfort, and I actually felt like exercising!  (A first in over a year....)  I was elated and ready to tackle the day.  I was even excited to be outside for the first time in a year and announced to the brood that we would be going outside after mommy finished putting the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher and wiped off the sinks. Then - "CRASH!" I couldn't stop it.....the container of dipping oil Rob had concocted the night before for our dinner with friends tonight went hurling onto the ceramic tile in an explosion of glass and oil and herbs....."Nooooooo!" I heard myself gasp.  And there it was - a huge mess I had no idea how to tackle.  After banishing the children to the school room in their bare feet, and denouncing our outside excursion, I sat down on the couch to drink my coffee and figure out how to clean up gloppy glass.  Wallowing in my self pity, my husban...
Read more

Liturgies, Heritage and Meditation

Image
"When there are thoughts, it is distraction;  when there are no thoughts, it is meditation."  Ramana Maharshi The beach is my meditation.  I sit.  I listen.  I watch.  I feel the sun.  I feel the wind.  I feel the sand. I hear the waves. I hear the laughter. I watch the horizon. I watch the children. I can't seem to think one thought.  I try. Any thought would be distraction. And no thought even comes to distract. If I read, it is frivolity. No thinking required. Pure superficiality. The beach is my meditation.   When I lived on the California coast, I jogged at the beach, I walked on beach; kept my chair and towel in my car to sit and read for a hour or two to unwind from my day.  Drove to the beach in the predawn light to meditate on God's word and fellowship with Him. Many parties were held at the beach. Many glasses of wine savored watching the sunset over the ocean. ...
Read more

All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Acting Class

Image
"There's nowhere else to be but here.  There's nothing else to do but this." These were the first words out of our amazing acting coach, David Ralphe, at the beginning of every class.   You would feel your shoulders relax and your mind’s eye come into focus at the front of the class.   There he would be, probing each of us with his intuitive eye, patiently and compassionately waiting until we were all “there” in the room with him before he commenced. Present.   David was calling us to be present in the moment.   Leave behind all the shoulds, the to-do list, the many obligations and expectations gnawing at us before we walked into class.   Let go of all the activities, events, conversations and circumstances of our day that pooled in our frontal lobe and limbs and joints, and come into this moment.   Don’t miss it!   Be fully available with your senses tuned in to hear, see and comprehend this moment, right now.   Often times we’re ahead o...
Read more